I have no words.
Well no, that’s a lie. I always have lots of words. But Ken’s all shirtless, with 1990s shorts, 6-pack abs and a tattoo. It’s like that Kimora Lee Simmons hooker looking Barbie — there is a right way to make a doll and then there is the way Mattel seems to have gone as of late.
Back on June 25, 2009 I blogged about Bella Swan & Edward Cullen Barbie. I believe somewhere in there were the words,
“Whereâ€™s Jacob Ken? Iâ€™m waitingâ€¦”
He’ll be arriving in February 2010 for $24.95 USD when the DVD of New Moon is released:-
While I joke, I kid and even have been known to say that little old Jacob is the love child of Sirius Black and Remus Lupin…he still looks better than Cullen Barbie who looks possessed. Good lordy.
Here’s the other thing — before the Edward Cullen doll was released, we had press pictures and they weren’t bad. These pictures, especially one, had the dolls are looking pretty fabulous.
Have you seen the latest ones? The real ones? The Edward Cullen, the doll, looks damn near possessed.
Would someone like to explain to me why Mattel is selling scary (literally), male, half-naked dolls to 12-year old little girls? Right, so I know what you’re thinking — “*ahem* Sasha, Malibu Ken was shirtless…get off your high horse.”
Alright, you got me there. But, still Malibu Ken wasn’t scary and these are just so… naked with wonky eyes, too.
And Barbie Bella, looks nothing like K Can’t Act, thank goodness. She should be flattered, Barbie does her well by not doing her at all
On that note, Mattel needs some lessons from Tonner — at least in making Edward Cullen. Tonner plans to released their Twilight dolls in February 2010 as well. I believe there is a Rosalie Hale doll in there too. But I’m not sure.
You can see the original post here, featuring Twilight Lip Venom Stain.